Wednesday, November 12, 2014

MY LONG DISTANCE STORY: HOW TO BE TOGETHER WHEN YOU COULDN'T BE FARTHER APART

Hi everyone! I thought for today's post I would do something a bit more personal. As you probably have figured out by now, my boyfriend Mike lives in another country. The one that's across the Atlantic Ocean, that place where they drink tea all day? Yep, my boyfriend lives in England. And yes, he is in fact very British. How did I meet him, you ask? Well it all started back in February 2014...


I was studying abroad in England. It was a Wednesday night. My friends and I were planning on going down to the student union like we did every Wednesday night. In Winchester, basically every night of the week is an acceptable night to go out! At the time, my friend Allison was dating a British guy named Theo (he went to Winchester too) and she told us that night at dinner that we could go to pre-drinks (drinks before going out) with her at Theo's flat! For all you Americans, a flat is an apartment ;) My friends and I got all dolled up per usual and headed on over to pre-drinks excitedly. Even though I wasn't looking for a boyfriend necessarily, the thought did cross my mind that maybe Theo had some cute British friends that I could talk to. When we walked into Theo's flat, my eyes went right to Mike. To this day, I still can't tell you what about him I was drawn to but I knew the moment I saw him that I wanted to talk to him! So I did.


I sat down next to him, and the first thing I said to him was "Do you play football?" (And by football, I mean soccer) I don't know why that was the first thing I blurted out but it seemed like a harmless conversation starter and to be honest I was nervous. He had an accent and I'm a huge sucker for accents. I have been my whole life! I've always dreamed of marrying someone with an accent, and a British one is at the top of my list! We continued talking until it was time to leave to head down to the student union. Our conversation consisted mostly of Mike making fun of me for not drinking as much as he was (if i did that i probably would have ended up in the hospital...the Brits can drink a lot) We hung out the whole night, dancing, drinking (Mike kept buying me drinks...isn't he a gentleman), and just having a good time. I know at one point I was belting out the lyrics to Don't Stop Believing right in Mike's face and I'm pretty sure at one point I used his knee to tie my laces because my boots kept coming untied...But anyways, we had such a great time together and we started hanging out every day! Which sounds excessive, but when you know you only have so much time to spend with someone it doesn't ever seem like long enough. We knew that we liked each other a whole lot, but the elephant in the room was the fact that I would have to leave to go back to America in a month and a half. Was it worth it to get into a relationship knowing that we might not see each other for a long time, maybe even never again?


Yes, it was. Fast forward two and a half months. Mike came to America for a month to visit me.  It was only the second time he's been to America, the first time was when he was much younger! He arrived on my 20th birthday, much to my excitement. I was definitely more excited for him to get here than for my birthday! :) It was so much fun to show him around America after he had shown me around England. We went to New York City (per Mike's request) and we saw all of the touristy things: Times Square, Top of the Rock, Central Park, even the subway system (which i would rather not see but it is part of the experience!) After a lovely month together, it was time to say goodbye again. It gets easier every time. But it's still never easy.


As of today, it is 34 days until I head back to England for the holidays! I'm so excited, it's seriously my motivation for finishing the semester. Mike and I haven't seen each other in three and a half months. We Skype on a weekly basis (unless one of us is really busy which does happen) and we talk every day but being apart still sucks. Big time.

Coming from someone who is basically a pro at the whole long distance thing (my previous relationship was an ldr at one point too), I have discovered my own ways of dealing with the distance. These are a few of my tried-and-true pieces of advice for anyone out there that is in a similar situation!

1. Communicate: The key to a successful long distance relationship is communication. Well, that's the key to any successful relationship but it's especially vital in a long distance one. Even if you're just telling each other what you're doing at the moment (no matter how mundane or ordinary) or snapping a pic of your dinner, it's important to show your partner that you're thinking of them and that they're still a part of your life even if they can't be there with you.

2. Busy is good: Since I knew I wasn't going to be able to see Mike until Christmas, I wanted to make myself as busy as possible. I'm the kind of person that tends to obsess about the future instead of operating in the present. I like being busy because it doesn't give me the chance to think about being sad. This semester I'm taking 5 classes, working part-time, and I'm the proud owner of this growing blog! :) With all that on my plate, I barely have the time to think about anything!

3. Set a date: Although it isn't good to obsess about the fact that you aren't together, it is good to have a date in mind (or set in stone if you can!) when you'll see each other again. Whenever Mike and I have to go back to being apart, I always worry about when we'll be together again. It's basically all I can think about until one of books a plane ticket and I know for sure when we can see each other. But when we set a date and I have something to look forward to, I always feel so much better :)

To anyone reading this who is in a long distance relationship, I understand and I'm always here to talk! I hope my tips helped you out even just a little bit. And if you aren't, I hope you never have to be in an LDR but if you do just know that a relationship always has the potential to be successful as long as you and your significant other are in 110%. I'm so glad that the universe brought Mike and I together that night in Winchester, I can't imagine my life without him. So thanks universe, I guess I owe you one.

I hope you enjoyed my story, I can't wait to see where life takes Mike and I :)

until next time,

8 comments:

  1. Oh wow, I can't imagine going that long without seeing your S.O.! The longest I went without seeing my husband while we were dating was 3 weeks and I thought I'd go mad. You are a strong woman :) Really great tips! Keeping busy is essential to pass the time more quickly! Good luck to you during finals this semester!
    xx
    Jenny // Mish Mosh Makeup

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  2. Aw how great it was the share a part of your life with you like this. How special of a post it was too, it's amazing you have made your relationship work like this it proves a lot . Lovely pictures.

    I'm from Britain and I don't drink tea that part was funny though hehe xox

    http://rainbowsandunicorns27.blogspot.co.uk/

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    1. thank you so much! :) shhhhh don't let anyone from the uk hear you say that... ;) xx

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  3. I'm genuinely in awe of your relationship! I couldn't image having a boyfriend who was on the other side of world and who I would see as little of as you do but you both make it work and that is amazing! Also, I am from England and I drink like 30 cups of tea a day, decaffe though :P x

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    1. mike got me addicted to yorkshire tea...he brought me a box when he came to visit me! i still have some but i can't wait to go back and have proper tea :) i always thought the idea of milk and sugar in tea was strange but once again, mike got me addicted :P

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  4. This is amazing. I think it's fantastic that you two make it work, congrats! xxx

    Rhiannon Talks - Fashion Blog

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